After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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