I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
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