Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
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