Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Randomize
