I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
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He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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