You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
that's an acceptable place to lick
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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