Nicole vs. Life
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Randomize
