I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
Damn victory sex feels great
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
