Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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