you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
only you would photoshop your dick
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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