It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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