I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
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