I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize