I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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