She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Randomize