i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize