My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
she smelled like a LAN party
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
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