You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
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