they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
