ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
Randomize
