my room smells like sperm. sweet.
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
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