im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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