I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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