the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
Randomize
