I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
