White coat. Heels.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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