Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
