So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Oh god it's open bar.
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