I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Randomize
