I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Randomize