We're facebook friends in real life
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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