I'm afraid we're only dating because we're too lazy to look for anyone else.
What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Miserable. My projectile vomit just woke me up from a 5.5 hour nap.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
