the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
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