It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
