question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
