She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
