she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Randomize