i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
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