So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
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I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
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come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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