i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
false alarm. still invincible.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
