u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
