is your mom at the bar?
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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