I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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