Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
You told me you were with a dog dressed as a taco, and it was the only one you trusted
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
