We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
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