Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
