Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Randomize
