after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
You told me you were going to invite all of your Tinder matches to the same bar on the same night and make them compete for your affection in a series of Lust Olympics. Winner gets laid.
Randomize
