mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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