Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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