Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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